I am a “scaredy cat.” I have been most of my life. Especially at night.
My parents did a really great job of helping me overcome many of my fears, to which I’m so thankful. I now enjoy some really fun things in life because I tried them and liked them: rollercoasters, swimming, diving boards, airplanes, moving to new places and life changes, trying new things/foods, etc.
But I admit that I’m still a little afraid of the dark. I remember as a child being so thankful that my parents stayed up longer than I did. I was safely tucked away in bed, knowing that they were awake should anything happen. Sometimes I would wake up in the middle of the night …. scared. I would be frozen with fear until the daylight appeared or my dad awoke and was stirring around. As soon as I could hear him awake and up, I would feel better. Safer.
Even to this day, if I wake up and it’s dark, I can let myself “go to fear”. What’s that noise?! I am still sometimes filled with anxiety or fear at night (in the dark). I will often toss and turn until Brent gets up. Thankfully, Brent is an early riser – well before the sun comes up. So on those nights of allowing fear to take over, I soon am able to rest well, knowing he is awake and up and all is well.
I recently started thinking about this unnecessary fear (and sinful, I know!) The psalmist says:
Behold, He who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
The great truth is HE IS AWAKE!
The great I AM is always up! He sees me, and is taking care of me. He also knows and sees my family and friends, wherever they may be. “Santa” may see me when I’m sleeping, and know when I’m awake 🙂 … But I have a Maker who formed my heart! He knows my name. He even knows my every thought. He sees each tear that falls and hears me when I call!
Emmanuel – God.With.Us.
No need to fear the night(s). No need to fear the storm(s). No need to fear the future.
He is near and He is good.
One thought on “Still Afraid of the Dark”
I love this! I am thankful for your vulnerability to share! I too have these fears and am now watching my amazing eldest struggle. His imagination is wonderful but it can run away with him. The past 10 days have been hard for him ( or should I say nights). We had an awesome conversation the other night very similar to your post but it is so good to know we are not alone in our fears and even better to not be alone in rejoicing that HE is awake!!!!! Love you much!